This Radio WBLOG, 77.7 on your AM dial, coming to you with all the news that's fit to use. The Pointmeister here, live from the deck of the Ark. We are now in the fortieth straight day of rain which has become known as The Great Flood of '05. We at WBLOG have tried to keep you informed and entertained with up to date news coverage and of course, your favorite music. (" I'll do my cryin' in the rain... ")
~ We are currently moored to an iron cross rising from the murky waters upon which we have been drifting. We have been told that it is the cross that adorned the steeple of a church. Below us in the water I can see quite literally hundreds of rats thrashing about trying to get high and dry. A few hours earlier, we even saw some rodents swimming around.
~ Reports from across the country have stories of similar conditions in California, as well as the entire West Coast from Baja to Alaska. (" It never rains in Southern California.. ") One Los Angeles Wal Mart was said to be running a store-wide sale. Apparently any customers who show up wearing scuba gear are welcome to the "cash and float" sale. (" ..it pours, man it pours. ")
~ The Eastern seaboard is no less affected by the rising waters of The Great Flood. From Maine to the Florida Keys, flotillas of people are waiting out the rain. The most trendy of sailing vessels has been the roof tops of former houses. (" Rainy night in Georgia.. ") Several porches, laden with families, can be seen plowing through the flood waters by means of outboard motors.
~ Several cottage industries have sprung up to take advantage of the plight of the displaced populace. Among these are: We 'R' Raincoats, Kelly's Kayaks, and Mary's Floating Candles. One entrepreneur failed however, when he tried to sell bottled water from Belgium. (" Somewhere, beyond the sea.. ") Surprisinly, the sales of Ivory soap has reached an all-time low. According to a company spokesperson, their inventory...just floated away! (" Come on down to my boat, baby.. ")
~ In the entertainment world, although attendance has been down to a trickle, some theaters have fared well. To the amazement of many critics, Ishtar is the current top money maker with a sizeable lead over Lawrence of Arabia and The Desert Fox. Not faring so well, as would be expected, are the re-releases of Waterworld, Splash and Jaws. (" .. Could that someone be ... Mack the Knife? ")
~ Our award winning Weather Central at WBLOG, 77.7 on your AM dial, is confirming reports that the rains are stopping around the country. Our Doppler radar shows the clouds dissipating and this will continue around the nation. (" Here comes the sun ... ")
~ That concludes our coverage of The Great Flood of '05 somewhere above New England. We will now hand over the air waves to our sister station adrift somewhere over the Appalachian Mountains. Taking over will be that noted Mountaineer, Blue Dilly Dilly, coming to live on WHIZ. Check him out at http://bluedillydilly.blogspot.com and see if he answers the question "willy really whiz?"
~ You've been listening to "To the Point with Point" on WBLOG 77.7 AM. Good night folks!