Saturday, July 02, 2005

Honey-Doings: Part IX

The much heralded day five had arrived. The much ballyhooed completion of my vacation project was at hand. After today, I would be able to look forward to a three day weekend, thanks to the bonus of the Fourth of July on Monday. I was looking forward to being able to rest, admire my handiwork, and to reflect upon the road I had taken to get to that moment.

After the obligatory routine of waking completely, and that only after my intake of coffee, I inspected the bathroom, paying particular attention to the ceiling. It had received a second coat the evening before to allow it to completely dry over night. Pleased there were no "holidays" and that the paint had covered evenly, I nodded with satisfaction. It was time to wallpaper!

The stage was set and the curtains had been drawn. Following a trip to the basement to retrieve a metal folding buffet table, I moved the dining room table aside to create some elbow room. I set up the buffet table near, but clear of the doorway. That was to be my base of operations. Nearby on a chair were the rolls of wallpaper, a papering brush, a yardstick, a seam roller, and an assortment of other tools of the trade that would be needed for the project.


Removing the plastic wrap from a roll of paper, I noticed something I didn't like. It was one of those 'uh-oh' moments. "Uh, Jeanne," I called out to my wife. "I thought you said this was pre-pasted wallpaper!" To this she replied, "It is," then she paused for a moment and added, "Isn't it?"

Well, it wasn't! This wallpaper had been in the house for over six months since she'd she'd bought on a close-out for 70% off the original price, along with some border paper also. A quick inspection of the border provided the same result. Just another bump in the road, I thought to myself. No biggie! I really should think about pricing my stock in that hardware store. They were about to make another sale - wallpaper paste!

Webster's New World Dictionary of the American Language defines "setback" as: to reverse or hinder the progress of. The same publication defines "crisis" as: a turning point in the course of anything, such as a decisive or crucial time, stage or event. You are probably wondering why the lesson in etymology and why now? That will soon be made abundantly clear.

While I had been setting up, my wife in another room, had been on the telephone. For several months, ever since the announcement of the date of my daughter's wedding of October 9, there has been a lot of behind the scenes activity, as you can well imagine. Concurrent to my vacation, have been the planning stages for the bridal shower.


Scarcely ten minutes after our discussion of pre-pasted or not paper, fecal matter struck an oscillating device! Apparently, the Maid-of-honor had just told my daughter to insert her wedding somewhere without sunlight. Generally, men as a species have very little to do with the planning of or the wedding itself. Just tell us what to wear and what time to be there!

My wife spitting fire and my daughter crying her eyes out, were enough ammunition for me tell the bathroom where to stick the wallpaper, at least for the time being. Besides needing to make a trip to the hardware store, I then had to take on a Robert Young role. But I'm not so sure this father knows best! I don't think Jim Anderson ever visualized his hands around a Maid-of-Honor's neck!

Sometimes life just seems to get in the way of living, as well as vice versa. While the events of my daughter's wedding plans are important and happen even during my vacation, they are the subject of another blog at some other time. Not certain what the balance of the day would bring, I resigned myself to the fact that that there would probably be no wallpapering this day. Even this blogger has a life and priorities. Hopefully tomorrow, another day, there will be some Honey-Doings Honey-Done, and it will be recorded in Honey-Doings: Part X.


1 comment:

schnoodlepooh said...

Wow. What a blow! And wasn't that b***ch supposed to be staying at your house and enjoying your new and improved bathroom??!! I hope that by now, you are over this crisis, wall papered, and on the road to an enjoyable three day weekend. Good luck.