....While invigorating, the first mow-job of the Spring is also educational. The lessons are free. All a student need do, is to open a window and listen to the professor. This early season class features a virtuoso lesson in the phonetics of slang. The spate of lexiconic verbiage will introduce the students to words that cannot be found in any Bible. With each yank of the starter cord, an almost melodious stream of words is made available for the student to add to their own vocabulary.
For now, the lawn mowing and vocabulary exercises will have to wait. That bitch, Mother Nature hasn't taken the shackles off Old Man Winter yet. Between you and me, I think she's into the kinky stuff, but Winter must like it. Only this week have the trees and some of the shrubs started to bud.
There are still some outdoor chores that can be started. First and foremost, the grill can be released from solitary confinement. It can then apply for a summer work-release program. It will get the job.
....This beauty has all the bells and whistles! Talk about state-of-the-art! You can grill some burgers, weinies, wings and ribs and all the while be blogging at the same time! With a special sensor chip, you can even "post" the smells of the grilling food to a smell pod. You might say it is "scratch and sniff" for the web.
My neighbor was out working on his boat. He was scraping and sanding to get it ready for a fresh paint job. He has to remove his ex-wife's name from the stern in order to put up his girl friend's name instead.
....From my own observations, I can see why a boat is defined as: "a hole in the water into which you throw your money."
Unfortunately, I have to wait a while longer before I send the snow blower to its post-winter storage. It has stay at the ready even into April, such is the weather in quaint old New England.
It is nice enough outside to wash and wax the transportation though. My wheels is wearing a dingy coat of dried salt and dirt and needs a serious washing. If perchance it does snow again at least a new coat of wax will protect it. Don't get any bright ideas any of you avian squatters.
After that I will grab a bite to eat, park my gluteus maximus in the Lazy Boy and fall asleep watching some excitingly boring program. I'll dream that the warm weather is finally here. I'll dream of cutoffs and the beach ... and bikinis ... and tee shirts ... and bikinis ...
I am poised at the edge of a triangular patch of coarse growth. The lawn mower is purring like a kitten. I trim the edges of growth. It is like soft heather damp and musty. Tee shirts ... and ... bikinis ... and ... fur ... and ... ass ...
My reverie is broken. The cat has jumped upon my chest and is rubbing against my face ... its fur ... and its ass!