Saturday, September 09, 2006

Blog of Dreams


Build it, they will come....

You've probably seen those Vehix.com ads on TV in which a stone-faced man asks two techs how they would make the site a better experience for car buyers.

One man comes up with practical and sensible ideas, which seems to impress the boss. Having easy to use navigational tools on one's site is desirable of course, but it's so ... vanilla!
....Sometimes you feel like chocolate, or strawberry, or Cherry Garcia!

The other man provides the commercials' comic relief. I'm not sure there is much of a demand for a window washer to drop down from the ceiling to clean the screen on your monitor. I doubt that many men would care for a visor with a vanity mirror mounted above their screens, although some women might wish to freshen up if they are using live web cams.
....I suppose if you were a video-gamer, a steering wheel instead of a mouse might be useful, and using the horn to navigate through links might actually be fun to some. I think if I had such a horn, I would substitute the "beep-beep" with an old fashioned "ah-ooga."

One idea, however, shows some promise to this Blogger. Obviously I wouldn't limit a scent application to only that of the smell of a new car. The possibilities here are endless. Can it be that "Smell-a-Vision" has been reincarnated as Smell-a-Blog?
....Imagine a Blogger posting a piece about horticulture,where with just a click of the mouse the reader would be rewarded with the aroma of roses or lilacs. There would be no need to stop at flowers either. One could have perfumes and colognes wafting from their sites. Like to read about food and recipes? How pleasing to the nose, taste buds and stomach would the smells of a pot roast, a turkey in the oven, or a steak on the grill be to a visitor to your site?

Of course, some Bloggers like Hoss would find innovative ways to put such technology to use. Just think how realistic they would be if smell accompanied his posts, especially those tributes he lovingly gives to the dung beetle.
....Let us not forget about his war on "butt cracks!" He could "reward" us the next time he writes about that subject with the smell of ... ahem ... well ... butt cracks!

Smell-a-Blog would be a precursor to more technology based on the senses. You didn't think I would fail to mention "Scratch n' Sniff," did you? Rather than clicking on a picture, you would scratch it on your screen to smell flowers or food. Of course, this technology would be quickly adopted by the porn sites to provide the smell of ...ahem ... well ... butt cracks!

....Should I draw the line there, or do I dare promote "Scratch n' Taste?"

No.742

8 comments:

jules said...

Ugh...Mikey....the idea of smell-a-blog for porn kinda grosses me out. And I LIKE porn.

Jack K. said...

The "smell-a-blog" is an idea whose time has come and gone.

Loved your other ideas though, except for the smell-a-porn site. lol

wazza said...

Gidday Mike, glad you enjoyed my Three Stooges post. It took a while to do and research altho' I do have four books on the stooges, but just puting it in some sort of order was
fun to do.
Loved the Thesaurus Rex post. Gee never knew they had such a funny stand-up routine. As for smell-a-blog (oops almost typed bog)there was a smell-a-vision in the cinemas some time ago whereas you received cards that you scratched when a word came on the screen that said e.g. perfume and you scratched the perfume card to smell it. It didn't take off either but....maybe smell-a-blog...nah don't think so

Peter said...

Hi Mike, smell a blog leaves me definitely cold I'm afraid, the bad outways the good there.

M.E Ellis said...

Ewww @ taste!

:o)

Carolyn said...

Where IS that offensive odor coming from? Oh no, it's from your blog! LOL! I vote to draw the line ;)

Raggedy said...

If I start smelling your blog when I come here I am going to de-link from you so fast...hahaha
I have missed you...
I loomed one of those pot holder thingies...
It is good to be back...
Great posts since I have been gone.
Have a wonderful day!
*^_^
(=':'=) hugs
(")_ (")Š from da Cool Raggedy one

Miss Cellania said...

Nix on THAT idea! Some blogs I've seen smell pretty bad already!