Monday, April 09, 2007

Political Toys

Coming To Toy Stores and Joke Stores Near You !

From the creators of Oscar the Grouch, introducing: George the Slouch !

Simply say "Weapons of Mass Destruction" and watch him disappear from sight!

For sycophants everywhere:

The Dubya Bobblehead

Is the perfect gift for that ass-kissing yes-man in your life. Just ask it a question and you'll get the same answer every time.

"Dubya, are you an idiot?"
"Did you brother Jeb rig the ballots in Florida?"
"Did you lie about he existence of the WMD in Iraq?"
"Are you the worst President in the history of the U.S.?"

BUSH BEER

We've all had beer that tastes like panther piss, now you can enjoy the mountain fresh taste of mountain lion piss.

Take it from the Bushettes, only BUSH BEER will make you want to get shit faced and run through hotels bare-ass naked.


Social Security Monopoly

Buy up all the real estate, charge high rents and when your opponents' Social Security money is gone, send them to jail for failure to pay their taxes. Or send them to Nursing Homes when you take their houses and turn them into high-rent condos.

If they get sick take away their health plans and watch them squirm.
Social Security Lottery Tickets

With these scratch tickets, Americans have a chance to win Social Security money to improve their quality of life in their retirements years.

Money not won will be placed into an annuity to insure that your Congressmen and Senators will live comfortably in their later years.


Bush License Plates

Proudly show American that you supported George W. Bush and his war on terrorism. Let them know that all you have left is one lousy plate to prove your loyalty.


You Republicans will love this one.

You've got to love our Veterans....

This man , 73, wears a protective flap
over his ear while Senator Ted Kennedy and Hilary Clinton addresses the Veterans of Foreign Wars.

(Thanks Earl.)

For good measure, here's a joke from my buddy Earl.

A large woman, wearing a sleeveless sun dress, walked into a bar in Dublin. She raised her right arm, revealing a huge, hairy armpit as she pointed to all the people sitting at the bar and asked, "What man here will buy a lady a drink?"

The bar went silent as the patrons tried to ignore her, but down at the end of the bar, an owl-eyed drunk slammed his hand down on the counter and bellowed -- "Give the ballerina a drink!"

The bartender poured the drink and the woman chugged it down. She turned to the patrons and again pointed around at all of them, revealing the same hairy armpit, and asked "What man here will buy a lady a drink?"

Once again, the same little drunk slapped his money down on the bar and said, "Give the ballerina another drink!"

The bartender approached the little drunk and said, "Tell me, Foy, it's your business if you want to buy the lady a drink, but why do you keep calling her a ballerina?"

The drunk replied, "Any woman who can lift her leg that high has got to be a ballerina!"

No.949

7 comments:

Soulsearcher said...

I'm guessing you're not a Dubya fan..lol ;)

jules said...

I'm sending you one more in your email account.

Serena Joy said...

Funny stuff! I'd buy those products. I'm particularly coveting the bobblehead.:)

Nankin said...

Great joke about the ballerina.

Scary Monster said...

LOL@ ballerina.
Didn't see that coming.

Kudos for the Dubuya in DWI as well!

STOMP!

Jack K. said...

Let's hear it for the ballerinas of the world. And the drunks too.

snerx

Top cat said...

These pictures are hilarious.
You can't joke enough about the joker in president if you ask me.:)
tc