Sunday, September 16, 2007

Rejected Peanuts Specials


We learn about VD in:
"IT BURNS WHEN I PEE, CHARLIE BROWN"

Charlie and the little red-headed girl learn about unwanted pregnancy in:
"I'M STARTING TO SHOW, CHARLIE BROWN!"

Is Linus gay?
"ITS A DIFFERENT KIND OF LOVE, CHARLIE BROWN"

Charlie moves back to his house in East LA in:
"OYE! VATO! QUE PASA, CARLITO MORENO?"

See how the Peanuts Gang deals with sexual pressures in:
"NO MEANS NO, CHARLIE BROWN!"

Discover a father's forbidden love in:
"IT'S OUR LITTLE SECRET, CHARLIE BROWN"

Franklin speaks! The Peanuts gang gets a lesson in Ebonics in:
"IMO BUSTA CAP INYO ASS, CHARLIE BROWN"

What goes on in the mind of a serial killer? Discover the inner workings of Pig Pen's twisted psyche and meet his murderous alter ego "Mr. Clean" in:
"GOD TOLD ME TO DO IT, CHARLIE BROWN"

Schroder teaches the Peanuts gang about getting high in:
"ROLL US A FAT ONE, CHARLIE BROWN!"

Charlie's little sister Sally walks in and catches him "choking the chicken."
"YOU'LL GO BLIND, CHARLIE BROWN!"

Charlie Brown gets his first job in:
"WOULD YOU LIKE FRIES WITH THAT, CHARLIE BROWN?"

Charlie Brown peddles his body for crack money while stealing social security checks and stripping cars in:
"GO BLAME SOCIETY, CHARLIE BROWN"

Peppermint Patty 'goes to town' on Marcie in:
"WHO NEEDS MEN, CHARLIE BROWN?"

Charlie gets an AOL account and stays up all night long in:
"WELCOME!... YOU HAVE MAIL, CHARLIE BROWN"

The peanuts gang learns about death in:
"WHY ISN'T LINUS MOVING, CHARLIE BROWN?"

Charlie Brown learns the pain of a sex change in:
"YOU LOOK DIFFERENT, CHARLIE BROWN"

Charlie Brown learns about cyber sex in:
"WHAT ARE YOU WEARING, CHARLIE BROWN?"

Snoopy goes to town on Charlies leg in:
"YOUR DOG REALLY LOVES YOU, CHARLIE BROWN"

Charlie Brown joins a fanatically religious cult:
"IT'S A WONDERFUL LIFE, CHARLIE BROWN"

The Peanuts gang learns about self-stimulation in:
"WHY ARE MY PALMS SO HAIRY, CHARLIE BROWN?"

Charlie Brown learns prostitutes are trouble in:
"WHERE'S MY MONEY, CHARLIE BROWN?"

Charlie Brown learns about STD's in:
"THAT WASN'T THERE BEFORE, CHARLIE BROWN."

Charlie Brown learns about the consequences of prison in:
"DON'T DROP YOUR SOAP, CHARLIE BROWN."

Charlie Brown learns about suicide in:
"GOOD-BYE, CHARLIE BROWN."

Charlie Brown learns about pornography in:
"WHAT THE HELL IS SHE DOING, CHARLIE BROWN?"

Charlie Brown learns about tax fraud in:
"HERE COMES THE IRS, CHARLIE BROWN."

No.1110

16 comments:

Marti said...

OMG, I'm laughing so hard my sides ache! That is so twisted and yet so hysterical! Thanks for sharing!

Is Linus gay?
"ITS A DIFFERENT KIND OF LOVE, CHARLIE BROWN" made me laugh the ahrdest - I don't know why - LOL

Hope you have a wonderful day!

Rain said...

ROFLMAO!

My personal favorite...
Charlie Brown learns about the consequences of prison in:
"DON'T DROP YOUR SOAP, CHARLIE BROWN."

Take care and have a great week!

OldHorsetailSnake said...

Those are ALL funny, Hale. Nice post. I am giggling still.

Badabing said...

Hehehe...those are all good. Hard for me to pick a favorite.

Anonymous said...

Soonafter Charlie Brown takes a job as a mortician's assistant, Linus finds him 'working' all alone at the morgue one night in..."YOU'RE A SICK F*CK, CHARLIE BROWN!"

Anonymous said...

The gang learns discovers the perils of testifying in open court against a narcotics dealer in..."YOU'RE A DEAD MAN, CHARLIE BROWN!"

Anonymous said...

One morning in the bathroom at school, Linus finds it necessary to defend his sexual orientation in..."I HAVE A WIDE STANCE, CHARLIE BROWN" (the unreleased prequel to "ITS A DIFFERENT KIND OF LOVE, CHARLIE BROWN")

Anonymous said...

Sally teaches Linus the hard truth behind the old adage regarding 'a woman scorned' (with a bit of help from the police) in..."SHE SAID SHE WAS EIGHTEEN, CHARLIE BROWN!"

Anonymous said...

The gang finally confronts Schroeder about his rampant homophobia in..."IT'S NOT NATURAL, CHARLIE BROWN"

Anonymous said...

After a string of bad choices, Lucy becomes involved in a hostage situation in..."PUT DOWN YOUR WEAPON, CHARLIE BROWN"

Anonymous said...

Following months of increasingly erratic behavior, the gang finally confronts Chuck about his drug problem in..."COCAINE'S A HELL OF A DRUG, CHARLIE BROWN"

Anonymous said...

As part of a school project, the gang all volunteer to help the RNC in Florida during the 2000 presidential election in..."'SWING STATE' MY ASS, CHARLIE BROWN!"

Anonymous said...

Charlie Brown fails to find acceptance overseas, despite high hopes for the student exchange program in..."YOU'RE THICK AS SHIT, CHARLIE BROWN"

Anonymous said...

Filling in for Lucy at her psychiatric stand, it becomes clear that Chuck is in over his head when an ill-advised excahnge with Franklin brings once dormant emotions to the surface regarding the murder of his abusive parents in..."YES THEY DESERVED TO DIE AND I HOPE THEY BURN IN HELL, CHARLIE BROWN"

Anonymous said...

Chuck learns that 'paying for it' just isn't the same in..."NO KISSING ON THE MOUTH, CHARLIE BROWN"

Anonymous said...

The gang help police solve a string of serial rapes in..."IT'S YOUR DNA, CHARLIE BROWN"