Saturday, February 05, 2005

XXXIX Nervous Breakdown

~ I will be but one of millions of other viewers who will be snuggled like a bug in rug in my recliner, captivated by the spectacle of Super Bowl XXXIX. Having bought into the hyperbole dished out to us, one can only hope that the event doesn't pale in comparison. No other sporting event in this country even remotely generates the interest or fascination that is this gridiron classic. What with the media frenzy, the exorbitantly priced caps and tee shirts, and the super this and super that sales promotions, is it any wonder that it is the advertising world's mother lode?
~ The phenomenon that is the Super Bowl encompasses so many households, that the media standard of demographics is thrown out the window. The nationwide audience will be comprised of men and women, the young and the old, and the true sports fan as well as the casual post season fan. Even housewives, who otherwise loathe the preceding regular season games because of their propensity to turn their husbands into vegetated couch potatoes, will find themselves wrapped up in the spirit of it all. Super Bowl Sunday has taken on all the attributes that lesser days have had legislated into national holidays.
~ Preparation for the big event has become almost as important as the game. The penultimate feasts run the gamut from chilis, chicken wings, arrays of chips and dips, as well as sandwiches. Regionally, of course, the menus are as varied as the people who partake of these culinary delights.
~ Naturally, no sporting event of such magnitude can be fully enjoyed without the obligatory pools. Not to be dissuaded by the question of legality, our money is poured into a myriad of these cursory chances to win at least a part of the pot. Invariable, a large number of the pool participants don't even know how it works. Far be it for that person to let on they have no interest in the game. Indeed, some return to work on Monday, those who didn't call in sick, to only then learn their square was a winner. These winners are proud of their new-found ability to pick winners.
~ The stage is set. It is time for the curtains to rise on Act I.
  • Husband: Now let's see, we have the copies of the pool. The food is ready. The fridge is stocked with beer and cola. All that is left is the game itself.
  • Wife: What's that you say? There is a game?
  • Husband: Of course! It's the Super Bowl!
  • Wife: All this running around! All this preparation has been for a football game?
  • Husband: It is the biggest game of the year! Of course I am going to watch it!
  • Wife: I know it is Super Sunday! It's the day they run those great commercials.
  • Husband: Well, yes. Some of them are pretty cool.
  • Wife: And dont forget the half time show! It's the best part!
  • Husband: Yep, it's the only chance I get to go to the bathroom.
  • Wife: I wonder if there will be another wardrobe malfunction this year? I hope it's some hunky male singer's codpiece!
  • Husband: (groan)

~ Thus the drama has been playing out for two weeks. America will be turning in Sunday, Feb. 6, to watch either the Super Bowl, or the commercials, or the half time show. Somewhere someone is making a lot of money on this thing. Somehow along the way my wallet got thinner. And somewhere girths will get a little wider.

~ I just realized that thanks in part to the Super Bowl, I have learned more about Roman Numerals that I picked up in high school.

I wonder what blue had to say about the Super Bowl? Why not find out at


No. 20

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