Friday, August 19, 2005

You Know...

You know it's time to change the water in the fish bowl when you cannot see the fish.

You know the insurance company your office chose might be a fly-by-night outfit when they send you to the airport for X-rays.

You know it's time to quit playing rightfield for your softball team when the catcher catches the the fly ball you were attempting to grab.

You know you aren't getting that modeling job when you discover your bra is on backward and nobody even noticed.

You know wife is mad at you when she substitutes Preparation H for your Viagra.

You know your wife is still mad at you when you find a cleaver and an icepick instead of a fork and knife beside your supper plate.

You know you must be getting old when you sort the junk mail and throw away the Victoria's Secret catalog, but keep the one from the Burpee Seed Company.

You know that technology is leaving you behind when it takes both you and your wife to set up the computer.

You know that when your wife answers a call from an old high school girl friend, it's doubtful that the dog chose that exact moment to chew through the telephone cord.

You know your wardrobe needs to be updated when your kids want to borrow your favorite suit jacket as part of their Halloween costumes.

You know your marriage has
lost its spark when your only competition for
your husband is on-line Klondike Solitaire!

You know you have shared too much of your husband's interests when you can name the offensive linemen for the Detroit Lions.

You know you have shared too much of your wife's interests when you can name the kinds of stitches she's using when she knits or crochets.

You know you are out of shape when you realize that the only exercise you get is changing channels on your TV set with the remote.

You know you are spending way too much time on the internet if you are actually reading his blog.

You know that you know that you actually enjoy reading this blog.



schnoodlepooh said...

Wow. Spam. Yukky. Anyway, I liked your post. You're a laugh a minute.

Hale McKay said...

Yes, darn Spam bots! I've been getting quite a few lately. I hope I don't have to change my settings to keep out spam. Some blogs have a code you have to type in - I guess the spam bots can't get past those.

Mike said...

Did anyone else happen to notice anything about the man in the blog clicking the remote to the TV?
Watch the channels that appear. Is it my imagination that there is an Old Hoss channel. I'll have to write my cable company and ask them to get it.

schnoodlepooh said...

Mr Hoss will be making his pile on this one. Too funny. Hoss TV! A new cable channel. More real than Animal Planet, more serious than Court TV, funnier than Comedy Central. Hoss needs to know about this one.!

Lightning Bug's Butt said...

These were great!