Saturday, November 12, 2005

Sextenuating Circumstances

Normal Male Brain

Fearful that I may have suffered some brain damage from excessive drinking years ago, I submitted to a brain scan. When the results came back, the doctor said I had a normal male brain. It was just my over-active libido, and it was quite normal. He did suggest however, that getting aroused over a breakfast plate of eggs-over-easy might be a little overboard. I decided it was probably wise not to mention the poached eggs and sausage.

Look, I know sex isn't everything, but is way ahead of whatever is in second place!

Like most people, I am a little tired of Paris Hilton. However, a link titled "Paris Caught Screwing Again," did catch my attention. So I just had to check it out! I was a little disappointed because I already knew she was handy with tools.

When I saw a link to optical illusions, I thought that it would be an interesting site to investigate. It would be a nice diversion from sex related material.

I studied this illusion for some time and I'll be damned if I can see a boat in the background!

I have been interested in Pompeii and the destruction of that city by the ancient eruption of Mt. Vesuvius for some time. When I spotted a link about the discovery of more of the inhabitants bodies which had been frozen in time from the ash, I clicked right to the site. What were the chances that I would encounter any references to sex?

I guess you could say the couple got screwed - but what a way to go!

The next site I found suggested sex, but I clicked on the link anyway. It said "Sexy Thong," but I took a chance that it was catalog site.
....If this was a catalog site, I'm telling my broker I am not interested in any IPO this company might be offering. Why pay all that money to that doctor? A look at this "sexy" thong would be therapeutic if I had an eating disorder. Gastronomical appetite aside, this image could cause a fatal dose of abstinence! If you read my last post (An Appetite Is A Terrible Thing To Waste) the woman in this pic is a twin to the lady who was chowing down on two cheeseburger club sandwiches.

If you think about sex too much, that thong picture surely doesn't excite you. Well, wait till see this next one. I, for one am cured (at least for tonight) after viewing "Your Swimsuit Is On Backward."

Just what is the difference between men and women anyway? Judging by the sites I had already visited, I was certain this image would also be sex-related.

The difference between men and women? Besides the obvious physical attributes, I would say it is simply the way they view the world and everything around them, especially when viewing themselves.



aka_monty said...

AHA! You're moving stuff around, that's why I couldn't comment on this post earlier. :)

Alls I want to know is...where'd you get the pic of me in the thong????
I was told all copies were destroyed. :P

OldHorsetailSnake said...

You trying to get more pictures of buttcrack on here than I get on my site? These all crack me up.

Also, don't know how I missed, earlier, your Salute. Thanks. 10% of nothing is nothing, though.

Tenderheart said...

I've seen all of these pics before, and they STILL make me