My feelings, beliefs, and/or ideas about just about anything. These may not agree with you, and that is okay. Nothing I say or imply is meant to offend. Allow me to hammer home my points. Satire is my cause and humor is my sword and pen.
Thursday, June 22, 2006
Zodiac Drivers
(The following appeared in a recent Readers Digest.)
Where are you?
Insurance Hotline analyzed accidents and traffic tickets of 100,000 drivers by astrological sign. From the top down, the worst to best:
Libra (Sept 23 - Oct 22)
~~Traits: Indecisive; craves consensus; flirtatious
~~~Car Karma: Lacks ability to make the snap decisions necessary to avoid a crash.
Aquarius (Jan 20 - Feb 18)
~~Traits: Stubborn; rebellious; unconventional
~~~Car Karma: Ignores the rules of the road, especially the speed limits.
Aries (Mar 21 - Apr 19)
~~Traits: Risk-taker; impulsive; childlike
~~~Car Karma: Wants to race you off the line when the light turns green.
Pisces (Feb 19 - Mar 20)
~~Traits: Daydreamer; theatrical; vulnerable
~~~Car Karma: Doesn't pay attention; prone to road rage and fishtailing.
Scorpio (Oct 23 - Nov 21)
~~Traits: Vengeful; possessive; strong-willed
~~~Car Karma: MIght chase you if you cut in front of them in "their" lane.
Taurus (Apr 20 - May 20)
~~Traits: Cautious; deliberate; stubborn
~~~Car Karma: Has an urge to charge at red lights; fails to yield.
Sagittarius (Nov 22 - Dec 21)
~~Traits: Talkative; independent; traveler
~~~Car Karma: Argues with police; extreme driving; talking on cell phone at the wheel.
Capricorn (Dec 22 - Jan 19)
~~Traits: Goal-oriented; designing; traditional
~~~Car Karma: So focused on the destination they ignore speed limits and traffic signs along the way.
Virgo (Aug 23 - Sept 22)
~~Traits: Analytical; skeptical; timid
~~~Car Karma: Focuses on minor details (the squirrel) - instead of the big picture (the speed trap)
Cancer (Jun 22 - Jul 22)
~~Traits: Moody; nurturing; family-oriented
~~~Car Karma: Considers other drivers an "extended family"; maneuvers car quickly.
Gemini (May 21 - Jun 21)
~~Traits: Alert; adaptable; curious
~~~Car Karma: Need for mental stimulation helps them spot changing traffic patterns.
Leo (Jul 23 - Aug 22)
~~Traits: Generous; egotistical; optimistic
~~~Car Karma: Strives to be a "star" driver and be respected for it.
See Rat Fink up there? That's me, and I'm an Aquarius. Unconventional?
....So what kind of Zodiac Driver are you?
No.667
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7 comments:
Don't know about anyone else's, but Capricorn was right-on for me! ~ jb///
A Gemini here Mike, about the onl word that really fits is curious 9or maybe "strange")
Pisces...and I HATE driving.
Leo:
~~Traits: Generous; egotistical; optimistic
~~~Car Karma: Strives to be a "star" driver and be respected for it
Gosh, I doubt I'm much of a star in my beat up old Bentra Sentra - LOL
That was fun to read though - thanks!
Not correct. I am a Libra and I have never had an injury accident. In fact, I've not had a bad accident of any kind. Find another list.
Capricorn here! *spot on* :-)
right on Scorpios.. but Im usually the one making the cuts...
Michael .. where you in Boston in 1977.. there was a shortstop called Bucky Dent who.. well Im sure you know the story..
If not Aaron Boone can tell it to you!!
T
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