Thursday, October 12, 2006

Recess Sports Olympiad

Attention card-carrying AARP members!

You probably think life has already passed you by and you've been put out to pasture. You've never experienced your fifteen minutes of fame!

Take heart, you can be an Olympic athlete! The furrowed skin on your forehead raises, ceding to the advance of your eyebrows. You heard correctly - Olympian!

Introducing the first annual Recess Sports Olympiad.*

If you're fifty-something or older, now you can realize those dreams of standing on the victory podium in front of an entire world audience. Imagine wearing bling that actually represents something. Be the pride of your nation when you sport a gold, silver or bronze Olympic medal.

Across the country there is a growing number of adults participating in "recess sports." They are forsaking the workout gyms and they are giving up on running. They are playing in competitive leagues of those sports you used to play on the school grounds at recess.

In the public parks from Washington D.C. to Fon Du Lac, Wisconsin; from Moosejaw, Saskatchewan, to Truth or Consequences, New Mexico - adults are returning to the games of their youth. The phenomenon is growing so fast, that the IOC has decided to sanction Olympic games in several of these sports.

When is the last time you played kickball, or dodgeball? Do you remember hopscotch? Get your taws and aggies out the attic, because marbles is making a comeback! You might want to start practicing your skill at jacks and jump rope. If you are still limber, how about digging out the hula hoop?
....I'm already trying to revive my skills at pitching pennies. Recently in Las Vegas, there was a $50,000 prize awarded to the winner of a Rock, Paper and Scissors tournament.

Who wants to be my training partner (gals, no guys) for a run at the gold in either post office or spin the bottle?**

What sports would you like to see included in the first annual Recess Olympiad? Tag, hide and seek, red rover? Sorry, but playing doctor has been rejected.

*While the idea of an Olympiad featuring the above old playground games is just a parody, they are in fact being played across the country by adults. I watched a group playing kickball this afternoon - and they weren't kids either. It is possible that kids these days don't even know how to play them.

** I'm still interested in a partner(s) for these two sports.

No.770

7 comments:

Peter said...

Those games all sound pretty energetic Mike, I'm thinkin' we need something like Watching paint dry... or grass grow, so nobody strains themselves.
Doctor would have definitely been over the top?????

Miss Cellania said...

Forget tag and hula hoop, sign me up for pitching pennies! Oops, I'm not OLD enough! Hahaha!

blue said...

Ahh, a recess olympiad! Not a bad idea, but I'm afraid all I could compete in would be eating lunch. Good post point!

Jack said...

Lunch was always my favorite pastime, too.

Hale McKay said...

Now how could I have forgotten lunch?

Cheri said...

Count on me if you are looking for a partner (**)!! Do you think they will check ID?

aka_monty said...

Count me in for the Spin The Bottle. And how about 2 Minutes In The Closet?