Thursday, July 05, 2007

When Kids Go To Church

Have you heard yours or someone else's little children say something embarrassing while ...in church?

3-year-old Reese:

"Our Father, Who does art in heaven,
Harold is His name. Amen."
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A little boy was overheard praying: "Lord, if you can't make me a better boy, don't worry about it. I'm having a real good time like I am."
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After the christening of his baby brother in church,Jason sobbed all the way home in the back seat of the car.
....His father asked him three times what was wrong.
....Finally, the boy replied, "That preacher said he wanted us brought up in a Christian home, and I wanted to stay with you guys."
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One particular four-year-old prayed, "And forgive us our trash baskets as we forgive those who put trash in our baskets."
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A Sunday school teacher asked her children as they were on the way to church service,"And why is it necessary to be quiet in church?"
....One bright little girl replied, "Because people are sleeping."
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A mother was preparing pancakes for her sons, Kevin 5, and Ryan 3. The boys began to argue over who would get the first pancake. Their mother saw the opportunity for a moral lesson.
...."If Jesus were sitting here, He would say, 'Let my brother have the first pancake, I can wait.'
....Kevin turned to his younger brother and said, "Ryan, you be Jesus!"
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A father was at the beach with his children when the four-year-old son ran up to him,grabbed his hand,and led him to the shore where a seagull lay dead in the sand.
...."Daddy, what happened to him?" the son asked.
...."He died and went to Heaven," the Dad replied.
....The boy thought a moment and then said, "Did God throw him back down?"
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A wife invited some people to dinner. At the table, she turned to their six-year-old daughter and said, "Would you like to say the blessing?"
...."I wouldn't know what to say," the girl replied.
...."Just say what you hear Mommy say," the wife answered.
....The daughter bowed her head and said, "Lord, why on earth did I invite all these people to dinner?"
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A father took his 5-year-old son to several baseball games where The Star-Spangled Banner was sung before the start of each game.
....Then the father and son attended a church on a Sunday shortly before Independence Day.
....The congregation sang The Star-Spangled Banner, and after everyone sat down, the little boy suddenly yelled, ''PLAY BALL!!!''
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The little girl went to church for the first time. As she was leaving with her parents, the minister asked how she had liked church.
...."I liked the music," she replied, "but the commercial was too long.
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Susie Sunshine asked her Sunday School class to draw pictures of their favorite bible stories. She was puzzled by Jimmy's picture which showed four people on an airplane, so she asked him which story it was meant to represent.
...."The flight to Egypt," said Jimmy.
...."I see...And that must be Mary, Joseph, and Baby Jesus," Ms. Susie said. "But who's the fourth person?"
...."Oh, that's Pontius -- the Pilot!"
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A four-year-old Catholic boy was playing with a four-year-old Protestant girl in a children's pool in the backyard. They splashed each other, got very wet and decided to take their wet clothes off.
....The little boy looked at the little girl and said, "Golly, I didn't know there was that much difference between Catholics and Protestants."

No.1037

3 comments:

Marti said...

"I'm having a real good time like I am." OMG - that is hilarious! Thanks for the giggles!

Hope you have a wonderful day!

OldHorsetailSnake said...

"...throw him back down." Oh, my, that (and many other) story(ies) lightened my day considerable.

Serena Joy said...

Oh, those are so funny! Out of the mouths of babes...