Today I thought I'd try to post some humor about Muslims. I found that it is not easy to find Muslim humor that would not be considered offensive to the camel jockeys. I certainly do not want end up as a target of some hadji's jihad. What I did find will be somewhat tame - because I couldn't find any other kind.
An Imam was feeling bored one Friday and decided to take the day off away from the Masjid. He told the assistant Imam he wasn't feeling well and drove off. He stopped at a golf course about forty miles away (so that no one would know him.)
Up in Heaven, the angels were talking. One said to another, "He can just get away with that! This is wrong - Jummah is mandatory for him and he is an example for so many believers!" The other angel agreed but decided to wait to see how Allah would take care of him.
The Imam teed off on the first hole and suddenly, the wind picked up, blowing the ball right in the hole for a 420 yard hole-in-one.
The angels looked at each other in great surprise. One said, "Why did He do that??" The other realized the wisdom behind it and smiled...
"Who's he going to tell?"
"Did you hear about this 20-year-old kid named John Walker from Northern California who was apparently fighting for the Taliban?... It didn't take long for the TV networks to jump on this Walker thing. CBS has a new show: 'Walker: Taliban Ranger.'" —Jay Leno
A man is taking a walk in Central park in New York. Suddenly he sees a little girl being attacked by a pit bull dog . He runs over and starts fighting with the dog. He succeeds in killing the dog and saving the girl's life.
A policeman who was watching the scene walks over and says: "You are a hero, tomorrow you can read it in all the newspapers: "Brave New Yorker saves the life of little girl." The man says: - "But I am not a New Yorker!" "Oh ,then it will say in newspapers in the morning: 'Brave American saves life of little girl'" – the policeman answers.
"But I am not an American!" – says the man. "Oh, what are you then? " The man says: - "I am a Saudi !" The next day the newspapers says: "Islamic extremist kills innocent American dog.
Two moslem sisters, Meenah and Neenah, have just arrived in the USA. On arrival they spot a hot dog vendor. Meenah says to Neenah, “Look, people in this country eat dogs.”
“Odd!” says Neenah, “but if we shall live in America, we might as well do as the Americans do.”
Nodding, they walk towards the hot dog vendor.
“Two dogs, please,” says Neenah.
The vendor wraps two hot dogs and hands them over the counter. Excited, the sisters hurry over to a bench and begin to unwrap their ‘dogs’. Meenah is the first to open hers. She stares at it for a moment and begins to blush with joy.
Then she leans over to Neenah and whispers cautiously, “What part did you get?”