Friday, March 14, 2008

Et Tu Brut?

The way this morning started out, I was beginning to think there just might be something to the Ides of March.

First I woke up a half an hour later than I should have. Then I burned my finger on the kettle while pouring the water for that initial cup of ambition. The coffee didn't taste right - I forgot to add my usual level teaspoon of sugar! Sipping my coffee and getting dressed at the same time, I figured I could make up the lost half hour. (As a rule, I like to sit back and take it easy with the first cup of morning coffee.)

I couldn't find my left shoe! It turned up in the next room - the cat had drug it in there by the shoestring. Nicked my cheek shaving! Couldn't find the styptic pencil. Stuck a piece of tissue on the cut. My coffee was cold. Put on the kettle for another.

I checked my watch and saw that I was still on schedule to make up the half hour. Took a sip of my second cup of coffee. I felt something on my tongue - the tissue had fallen from my cheek into the cup!

Finally on the road to my first appointment of the day the traffic was accommodating. I was making good time. In fact, I was on a pace to be there a little early. The operative word - was! About halfway to my destination, I swerved to avoid a pothole but hit an even larger one. What happens when an irresistible force (the pothole) meets a movable object (my tire)? Flat tire!

The half hour I had made up evaporated in the time it took to change the tire, and by the time I had reached my client's apartment complex, another half hour had passed. In the end, I was 45 minutes late. (Earlier, I did have the forethought to call the client and tell her I was going to be late.)

The rest of the day was relatively without any Ides-of-March-induced incidents. The next operative word - relatively. I was just finishing the first draft of what would become this post when I dropped my Thesaurus. Its corner landed squarely on the escape key! My nearly finished, and need I say unsaved document was no more!

I managed to stop at a garage to have my flat tire checked. There was no damage to it. The force of hitting the pothole had only broken the seal to the rim and all the air had escaped. Since I was there, I had the tire and the spare swapped.
I did have a strange mystic moment of a psychic nature! I had stopped at a Wendys for a cheeseburger and some french fries. In front of me in line were two women having a conversation about one of their new boyfriends. They were talking loud enough that I couldn't be accused of eavesdropping. In fact, I couldn't help but hear their conversation.

"What do see in him, anyway? He's so ugly and he's fat," said one girl.

"Hey! I like him. He's a nice guy," the other answered.

"Okay, he's a nice guy. So what does he bring to the table?"

I thought and maybe even moved my lips, "Besides a knife and a fork?"

At precisely the same moment those words were forming in my mind the first girl said, "Besides a fork and a knife?"

I dropped the $5 bill I was holding in my hand. It's one thing for great minds to think alike, but at the very same instant and in the same precise words?
In closing let me remind you to ... Beware the Ides of March.



Skunkfeathers said...

As with an upcoming Tornado Chasing For Dummies anecdote ('06), you were visited by an unwanted guest: Murphy. ML# whatever: Murphy goes where and when Murphy wants.

Ettu, MA?

Jack K. said...

Thanks for the warning.

Have a great weekend.

Hale McKay said...


I always suspected that the Ides of March might be governed by Murphy's Laws.

Hale McKay said...

Thanks Jack,

...And a good weekend to you too.