Tuesday, February 15, 2005


~ We entered the Dead Zone on a Sunday evening, mere minutes after the final seconds ticked away on the scoreboard clock of Super Bowl XXXIX. For some, it took a while to set in, but for others the realization was instantaneous. As if they had taken a wrong turn of an unfamiliar highway, it was evident then they were quite lost.
~ There is a definitive line of demarcation that occurs when football ends that creates a void wherein space and time appear to cease. It is an event horizon of a stellar black hole from whicn nothing can escape. Hence it surely must require a cataclysmic force to finally set the physics of relativity back into motion.
~ That force, energized by the inevitable persistence of life, is released not in massive explosions of super novae or of matter and anti-matter, but by a simple act unheralded by the dynamics of Einsteinian theories. E=MC squared is not applicable here, as there are forces that exceed those covered by quantum mechanics.
~ When the pitchers and catchers first report to spring training, there is a doppler shift between the red and blue spectra. An updated formula comes into play, and this equation, MF=ST, has had even Steven Hawkings amazed that he missed it completely. It is simplicity in its design and of its implications. The secrets of the universe and the keys to the space-time continuum, both are solved! MF=ST, is Mid February equals Spring Training.
~ The Dead Zone is not an inescapable force after all, but a necessary respite, a reprieve from a few collegiate hockey and basketball games, as well as the NBA. It is the quantum health spa of the cosmos wherein the sports fan is conditioned from the rigors of the NFL to the serenity of a baseball game.
No. 36
Johnny Carson
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