Thursday, June 08, 2006

Lemming Ade

Lemming Ade - The preferred drink of followers.

Trying to avoid hitting a deer in the road, an SUV swerved on an oil slick and flipped onto its side. The driver, shaken up, was okay. Said a police officer at the scene, "Those SUVs won't stop on a grime."

Maybe the paranoia over the bird flu has gotten a little out of hand. It seems that the sale of Cuckoo Clocks are at an all-time low.

It's a strange world we live in when the same person who bitches about the price of gasoline, will think nothing of spending $5 for a cup of coffee at Starbucks.

When asked why the Democrats and Republicans of the Senate appropriated so much money for new bathrooms, the contractor matter-of-factly replied, "Every party needs a pooper."

Give me ambiguity or give me something else.

Why do they lock gas station bathrooms? Are they afraid someone will clean them? - George Carlin

We have enough youth. How about a Fountain of Smart?

I think every blog should feature at least one picture of a chick with a nice pair of knockers, don't you?

Here's an easy math problem. Do it in your head. Don't use pen and paper or a calculator.
...Take 1000 and add 40 to it. Now add another 1000. Now add 30. Add another 1000. Now add 20. Add another 1000. Now add 10. What is the total? (answer: See comments.)

Want a good thing to say when answering a call from a telemarketer?
....Welcome caller number 9. To win $1000 give the name of the artist of the last song? (Then hang up.)

Today's post is another olio of notes and ideas sitting around as drafts waiting to become a post. As such, so much potpourri becomes yet another rambling blog.



Hale McKay said...

Math problem:

Did you get 5000? Way to go! Most of you did too. Join the crowd.

But you know whaqt? You're all wrong!

The correct answer is 4100!

Don't believe it. Try your calculator or pen and paper now.

OldHorsetailSnake said...

"...a chick with a nice pair of knockers." Ho ho har de har har.

Peter said...

..a chick with a nice pair of knockers.

That one must appeal to all us old geysers Mike.

Megan said...

Love the chick. Not crazy about those knockers though. Too big. ;)

Rebecca said...

“Don't sweat the petty things and don't pet the sweaty things”

Thats my motto!

Duke_of_Earle said...

I dunno, Rebecca. Sometimes petting sweaty things can be fun.

Peter said...

Cantget into your current post to comment on this.

Men have two emotions: Hungry and Horny. If you see him without an erection, make him a sandwich.

Duke_of_Earle said...

(I can't post a comment on your current post either.)

"...a rejection letter from a story that Billy Joe McCallister wrote."



jules said...

It's not leaving me an option to post a comment on the one before this, so here goes.... #8 is SOOOO true! Want a sandwich, Mikey?

Webmiztris said...

you totally got me on that math problem!!! gawd, I feel dumb! lol

"It's a strange world we live in when the same person who bitches about the price of gasoline, will think nothing of spending $5 for a cup of coffee at Starbucks"