Lip Synching Mimes

~ I suppose it was bound to happen sooner or later. In a revelation that is sure to shake the entertainment industry to its foundation, it was learned that mimes have been lip synching. Even as this story was breaking, many professional mimics have reportedly been seeking legal counsel. Many entertainment critics have voiced concern that this could be the death knell of this time honored genre.
~ When reached at home by phone, Marcel Marceau had no comment. The popular mime duo of the 60s, Shields and Yarnell were said to have only shrugged when confronted by journalists. At subway stations and city parks across the nation, the absence of these performers was all to apparent.
~ This is not the first time that lip synching has become an issue in the entertainment world. The most noted case was that of Manilli Vanilli, caught lip synching in a sold out concert. The real shockwaves however, was the fact that their voices were dubbed on their recordings. It seems our two boys couldn't sing! That in and of itself isn't shocking, as there have been many recording artists who couldn't sing. (sic Ashlee Simpson)
~ Even as the pall of Lip-synch Gate was spreading through reports around the country, sound and voice experts have begun reviewing countless recordings of mimics from the vaults and archives of prominent studios. Poring over literally thousands of miles of tapes and mountains of recordings, these experts are looking for any evidence that the mimes can actually talk.
~ This would quite tragically destroy the fame of these artists and forever taint the art itself. The very existence of the art of miming has been dependent on audiences marveling at the skills of those voiceless people. They have been held in awe as have blind and deaf recording artists.
~ If a mime could talk, then it would be supposed that their routines had been acted out by stand-ins or body doubles. Their clown-like painted faces would make the perfect cover for someone else to pose as them. A critic, who wished to remain anonymous, has suggested that the Mel Brooks film Silent Movie should be studied closely. It has been well documented that only Mel Brooks' genius could get the famous Marcel Marceau to speak the only words in the entire film. Audiences reveled in the irony, and always wondered whose voiced was dubbed. Now the question has to be asked, did Marcel actually speak those lines? The horror of it all!
~ The avalanche of controversy hasn't ended with just recording artists and mimes. There are rumors that investigations have been launched into the realm of animation. What if it turned out that Mr. Magoo spoke his own lines? The legacy of Jim Backus would be tarnished. What about Mel Blanc? Or Daws Butler? Or Frank Oz?
~ The reverberations of Lip-Synch Gate will have far reaching effects. Will entertainment ever be the same? Lest you subject yourself to investigation, please don't shrug, shake your head or nod. Speak up. Silence is not golden.
~
~No. 59