Flawed Laws For Scofflaws

I didn't know if I was coming down with something when I got home this evening, but I knew something wasn't quite right. I didn't even feel like having supper.

All I know is that I was having these urges to exercise, to quit smoking, to stop drinking, to leave the TV off, and to desist from posting anything on my Blog with sexual content.

So I decided to lie down on the couch until those feelings passed. Thankfully, they did.

While lying there convalescing, I stared up at the ceiling and pondered what I might post tonight. I nixed the idea of poking fun at our Commander-in-Chief. I decided not to make any Tiger Woods jokes. I thought about ranting, but I wasn't in the mood for any obloquy. ( I didn't want the readers to go reaching for their dictionaries. )

Then I begin to feel hungry, but figured it wasn't a good idea to ask for the supper to be heated up again. --->

I made but one New Year's Resolution and I'm happy to say that it hasn't been broken yet. ( I resolved to make no resolutions. )

However, the subject of resolutions did give me an idea. I came up with a few resolutions that our Senators, Congressmen, and other lawmakers SHOULD have made. Of course, their resolutions would have been broken anyway - eventually. Here's a few:

□ - It will be against the law to charge more than $1 for a cup of coffee, a bottle of water, a small popcorn, or a newspaper.

□ - Companies cannot hire workers to deal with the public or answer telephones who cannot speak English.

□ - Instructions, especially in operating manuals shall be in only one language - English.

□ - Pharmaceutical companies cannot advertise drugs on television that have more side effects than what they are touted to treat.

□ - All elected political positions will have limits of two terms.

□ - Any television celebrity (i.e. Oprah) who announces they are retiring must leave the airwaves immediately, not a year or two later.

□ - Teachers' salaries will exceed those of athletic directors and coaches.

□ - Infomercials of more than 60 seconds will be outlawed.

□ - Reality programs must be aired on a pay-per-view basis. If people really want to watch them, they'll pay.

□ - Ex-Presidents will no longer be addressed as Mr. President. ( They are no longer President. )

□ - The same fuel emission laws placed upon private vehicles will be also applied to racing cars (NASCAR, Indy, etc.)

If you are thinking that the above reflect some of my pet peeves, you'd be correct.

Maybe you have some of your own ideas on this subject. I'd be glad to read them in the comments section.

№ 1882