Monday, February 15, 2010

PETA Terrorists

PETA is at it again! Having failed to have Punxsatawney Phil replaced with an animatronic groundhog, they've set their sights on Mickey Dee's. Apparently the sale Chicken McNuggets at McDonald's has gotten them riled. Does this mean that Col. Sanders' Kentucky Fried Chicken gets a reprieve?

In the past they've attacked everything from the circus, zoos and aquariums, the fur industry. If they had their way ALL products from animals would be banned from human consumption.

Just what is PETA, and what does it stand for anyway?

PITA (Pain In The Ass) - oops!

PETA (People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals) is organizing more and more protests and each protest seems to outdo the last.

PETA (People Eating Tasty Animals) seems to be willing to give up everything for their animal cause.

PETA (Previously Employed Total Airheads): Do they really care about animals or do they care more about having a "cause" and being part of something?

PETA (Plenty of Exposed Tits and Ass): It's nice when beautiful girls show off their bodies, but does it really help animals?

PETA (Playboy Exists Take Advantage): Many of the nude/semi-nude women employed by PETA are Playboy models. Would this be considered protecting bunnies ?

PETA (Princesses Exposing Their Anatomy) Aren't they simply exploiting women to spread their message? Why aren't feminist groups attacking them?

PETA’s president has said that “even if animal research resulted in a cure for AIDS, we would be against it.” PETA has repeatedly attacked research foundations like the March of Dimes, the Pediatric AIDS Foundation, and the American Cancer Society, solely because they support animal-based research aimed at curing life-threatening diseases and birth defects. PETA helped to start and manage a quasi-medical front group, the misnamed Physicians Committee for Responsible Medicine, to attack medical research head-on.

~ ~ PETA has decided NOT to release a video that would have incriminated Goldilocks for abusing bears. Allegedly the footage shows the girl stealing their food and using their bedding. They will not pursue the matter as the video camera had been illegally placed in the bears house and without their permission.

However, they will pursue charges against Mother Goose for the cruel treatment of Humpty Dumpty which resulted in the ovate characters demise.

They have also been in discussions with the lawyers of the Big Bad Wolf. It is believed they will seek punishment to the fullest extent of the law against Little Red Riding Hood.

What are some possible future causes for PETA? Who do they attack next?

Are Keebler and Nabisco about to placed under siege because of their Animal Crackers? Does Pepperidge Farms have need for concern because of their Goldfish crackers?

Perhaps Elmer Fudd should seek counsel, lest he be charged for his abusive hunting practices involving Bugs Bunny and Daffy Duck.

Shame on those who sleep on goose or eider down feather pillows! Do they realize how many geese and eider ducks are running around bare ass and freezing to death?

A word of warning: During the next Christmas holiday, don't let PETA catch you giving such gifts as partridges, turtle doves, french hens and calling birds. That goes for the geese and the swans also! Don't let those maids milk any cows either!

You might also want to be careful during Easter with your consumption of those Peeps!

PETA (Please Eradicate These Assholes)



Jack K. said...

PETA (Put Enema Tube A?)

Someone else can add the rest of the word for A. snerx.

Sandee said...

At our Christmas yacht club function last December the gals all wore their furs and the guys were in tuxedo's. They would have had lots of fun with us. They wouldn't have stood a change.

Have a terrific day. :)

Hale McKay said...



Hale McKay said...


I would love to see that confrontation.