Sunday, September 10, 2006

Pre-Game Nuptials

Praise the Lord and pass the remote!

....I know I bastardized a famous war quote, but really, this time of the year the remote is all the ammo I need. In reply to another "war" quote, I'm ready for some football!

For thirty-four years I have tried to live by the vows my wife and I exchanged at the altar. Spelling aside, that area of the church is aptly named. Does that day forever alter one's life, or what?

We took each other and promised to love, honor and obey our betrothed till death do us part. We've never had any problem with the loving, honoring or obeying part. Well, I guess we both push the envelope a bit when it comes to that obeying thing.
....I do wince some when it comes to that "till death do us part" piece of the marriage equation. I mean death is kind of final isn't it? It's like forever, but with an escape clause.

To have managed a successful marriage, we've each had to attach a few riders to the contract. You could call them "give and take" bylaws. Unlike some marriages amongst baby boomers, we have remained together in part because of those riders.
....When we tied the knot, prenuptial arrangements were unheard of and would have been viewed as preposterous. We got married under the presumption that we would stay married.

That brings me to the football season. Admittedly, most of the aforementioned riders that have been enacted have been in my wife's favor. However, I'm no fool. For the most part I have reserved my riders for "special" things, like football. From September through January, Sundays are set aside for football. No plans or chores will be scheduled on the Sabbath. The Sabbath is for football! The first Sunday of the season is the Holy of the Holies!

Do you take this woman to be your wedded wife, for better or for worse, through good times and bad, and through sickness and in health? Do you promise to love, honor and obey her? Will you honor her mother, take her to chick-flicks, take out the trash, and put the toilet seat down? (Whoa, momma never told me that marriage was going to be so demanding!)

....I'm thinking...

....Do you take this man to be your wedded husband, for better or for worse, through good times and bad, and through sickness and in health? Do you promise to love, honor and obey him? Will you honor his mother, go with him to the hardware store, prepare his favorite meals, and keep Holy football Sunday? (Mom said to cross my fingers at this part.)

....I'm thinking...

So you see, a successful marriage is a series of compromises (riders) and counter-compromises (over rides)
which make it a democratic institution. Of course, there can be some heated lobbying at times.

Here it is, Sunday, football Sunday. It is first down and three games to go until ...

Monday Night Football!



Peter said...

I feel totally unqualified to comment on this post Mike, so instead I'll thank you for the info on Beta Blogger instead.

Jay said...

Jeez, you almost make it sound like football is interesting or something.

jules said...

I have never understood men's obsession with sports (particularly football), cars or sex. Oh....wait...I totally understand the obsession with that last one.

Thoughts said...

I have been married for 25 years and separated for the last 5.

I didn't think it would happen (the split) but I was wrong.

At this point, I am looking forward to the final step which is the divorce.

I will, however, never marry again nor even connect in the same way with another women.

One other step I am looking forward too is the day my youngest son moves on and out of my house, just to get on with his life.

I hold no hope nor do I care if I am remembered. My mark in this world are my three kids, may they do great things.


Jack K. said...

Hale, what a great posting.

Having survived 39 years of wedded joy, most of the time, I have discovered an important set of rules that has added to it.

Essentially, guys, it is these three phrases:

1. Yes, ma'am.

2. No, ma'am, and

3. Whatever pleases you my love.

It is absolutely esssential to be sincere whenever you use any of them. lol

In our household it is my wife who is more interested in sports, football, basketball. I prefer sports car racing.

As you and your wife have discovered, marriage is a give and give arrangement.

Continue to....

Serve well, care about those you serve and share the love in your heart.

Fred said...

I had the Patriots in the pool at work. Since we don't use the odds, I lucked out.

And, those Bucs. What a wonderful start. Not.

Nankin said...

FOOTBALL...GROAN! My husband will watch any game, any time, any where and I'm already tired of football. I guess that's why we have 2 televisions. And may the best team win.